In Ireland

«So they arrived at the other side of the lake, in the region of the Gerasenes.

When Jesus climbed out of the boat, a man possessed by an evil spirit came

out from a cemetery to meet him. This man lived among the burial caves and

could no longer be restrained, even with a chain. Whenever he was put into

chains and shackles—as he often was—he snapped the chains from his wrists

and smashed the shackles. No one was strong enough to subdue him. Day and

night he wandered among the burial caves and in the hills, howling and cutting

himself with sharp stones.

When Jesus was still some distance away, the man saw him, ran to meet him,

and bowed low before him. With a shriek, he screamed, “Why are you interfering

with me, Jesus, Son of the Most High God? In the name of God, I beg you,

don’t torture me!” For Jesus had already said to the spirit, “Come out of the

man, you evil spirit.”

Then Jesus demanded, “What is your name?”

And he replied, “My name is Legion, because there are many of us inside

this man.” Then the evil spirits begged him again and again not to send

them to some distant place.

There happened to be a large herd of pigs feeding on the hillside nearby.

“Send us into those pigs,” the spirits begged. “Let us enter them.”

So Jesus gave them permission. The evil spirits came out of the man and

entered the pigs, and the entire herd of about 2,000 pigs plunged down

the steep hillside into the lake and drowned in the water.»

(Mark 5: 1-13)

I am at morning Mass, and this is the gospel of today. After having read

it, the old priest says in his homily: «What are the evil spirits?

The evil spirits, they have names.

They are: Fear, Guilt, Shame and Desperation.»

«What an enlightened priest», I said to myself, he is absolutely right,

and one could also add: Un-forgiveness and Bitterness and Critical Spirit

to the list.

But the the evil spirit of fear, seemed to have been almost always present

in my life, and not just my life, but in the lives of so many.

It is insane, this fear, it rules our life, and we often do not even know it.

Fear hampers development and it blocks LIFE itself, we freeze.

We are not talking about what happens to us when we are in a dangerous

situation, that is purely organic and normal.

We are dealing with something that is in our minds, that is crippling.

But I am not afraid any more. I am free. I now know, in the depth of my

heart, that God not only accepts me, He LOVES me!

With a love like that, it is impossible to be afraid.

«I sought the LORD, and he answered me; he delivered me from all

my fears.»

(Psalm 34:4)

«So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right

hand. For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says

to you: Do not fear; I will help you»

(Isaiah 41:10,13)

“There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with

punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love.”

(1 John 4:18)

“For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.”

(2 Timothy 1:7)

The evil spirit of desperation, in it's different manifestations, is the result

from a lack of Hope, essentially it tells you: «it is useless, you are doomed.»

In France:

I am with the parish on a 4 day trip, with the new priest, Father Nicolas.

We are in 2 buses, we visit churches and places, restaurants and museums.

It is not a pilgimage, but a parish visit. I get to know a few people.

Another Village in France:

It is after Mass and I invite 2 of the people that I met on the trip to

Brittany for a cup of coffee in the local café.

The two of them becomes embroiled in an argument. It becomes

heated, and it continues outside after we leave the café.

One of them accuses the other one of

«believing that she knows better than her», and it ends there.

Some time later when I spoke to the one who was accused of

«knowing better», she told me that she had gone straight to the priest

to confess, because she felt that perhaps the woman was right in what

she was saying regarding «her knowing better», which would be the

sin of pride.

But the response of the priest, who did not want to hear her confession,

was: « don't worry at all, that woman who said that, she is just very bitter,

and she takes it out on people»

I thought that was a very strange thing to say to someone who was aware

that she needed to confess, because she was right, she can be very arrogant.

And he told her no! A priest!

And not only that, he was talking bad about another parishioner to her.

I start to realize that maybe he is not such a holy priest after all, not such a

great priest as he led us to believe, every time he was talking about him

being member of the Curé d'Ars community.

It is clear that he does not resemble Curé d'Ars very much, who was famous

for hearing people's confessions for hours and hours on end.

And I am sure that the Curé d'Ars did not blacken the names of his parishioners

either.

«Deepening the Faith»

The Village in France

The evening mass is ready to start, most of us week mass goers are there

already, but then enters Sister Agnes, who sits down next to me. For quite

some time now, she has had a bad cough, it is bronchitis. She coughs

throughout the Mass.

When this mass is over, I say to her: «Sister, I have some Irish seaweeds

at home, I have always found it very useful and efficient against coughs,

I will give you a packet.»

Calling to the house where she lives, together with the other Sisters, I give

her the packet, and she is delighted, asking me how to prepare the liquid

from the seaweeds.

She tells me her age, she is in fact much older than she looks.

She tells me that she was a secondary school teacher in her professional

life, before she retired.

The other Sister gives me a lovely hug, I can feel her maternal heart.

I set up a Lectio Divina group in the village, we need the Word, to

come together in a group, to talk about our lives in relation to others

and to God.

After reading the gospel of the week together, slowly, we meditate on

it a bit in silence, before somebody will take the first word.

I might be something like:

« I felt very touched/annoyed etc... by this sentence or that expression

in the text,...

or: what does this word mean or what did Jesus try to tell us with this

parable etc...

«I don't like this text at all, it makes no sense...etc...

We discover that all the texts are relevant to us, today, in a completely

direct way.

It is the Living Word, the truth, that never changes.

Whether it is in or out of fashion, makes no difference, it remains the

truth. How to manage and balance our everyday life, in order to be

healed, righteous, justified, safe, and to have eternal life?

Eternal life, meaning: Life with the Living God, right Here and Now.

With Him, Through Him and In Him.

The instructions, methods, way, to obtain that, is what the teachings of

Jesus is all about. Through the Church's Sacraments and daily prayers

we have the way that leads to God.

No other person can heal the wounds in your soul, and give you the

strength and motivation to want to change, to forgive and to love.

To start a New Life.

We must be aware that it is Him we are following, and not be led astray

by something that somebody says. To be awake.

Again, the worldly conditioning of people is different to the teachings

of Jesus.

“If anyone causes one of these little ones—those who believe in me—

to stumble, it would be better for them to have a large millstone hung around

their neck and to be drowned in the depths of the sea.

(Matthew 18, 6)

It makes no difference if something is said out of the best intentions,

if it is not from God, it is from the world.

The person might be on «your side», but the only safe thing to do, is to

follow Jesus.

With Jesus, like in all love relationships, you play an active role, with

the dimension of total trust and confidence in Him. You will be free from

yourself, and at the same time find yourself, your true self.

It is a bit like:

If you want to have a car and drive around in it, there are a whole bunch of

requirements, rules and regulations to follow, both regarding the car, and

regarding the driver.

If you take care of all that, and then you sit into your car, it is with good

reason that you have confidence that the car will obtain for you what it

inherently promises, that is: that it will get

you to your destination safe and sound.

«And lead us not into temptation»

We are around 12 people present for the lectures with the priest in the

parish hall. It is Lent.

We have the text for the day, and each one takes turn to read aloud a

piece.

Then the text is dealt with in detail, and is explained by the priest.

There is a relatively young, blond woman on the other side of the table

who I have never seen before.

She keeps her head down a lot, and when it comes to her turn to read,

she doesn't, it is passed to the next person.

Next week's session is the same, and during all the following meetings,

we never hear her voice.

Easter Sunday

The church is full.

During this Easter ceremony, the priest makes this mysterious blond

woman come forward, she is to be initiated into the Holy Catholic Church.

At the end, she joins the parish priest on the pulpit, where they sing a few

hymns together. It looks intimate, they look like a couple.

Afterwards there were comments.

The following weeks and months, her children are often part of the altar

service, and she herself seems to be doing everything in the church:

singing, taking the collection, taking part in the catechesis, lessons for

children, going on excursions, etc,etc.

Even though she is a newcomer, she seems to be very at home with it all.

She is young, she is pretty, and she has recently left her

husband. For some reason she tells everybody that

«people are saying that my youngest baby is not that of my husband's.....»

According to her, her husband even goes so far as to say that it is the priest's

child. Why is she telling us this?

Now she lives a few houses away from the Presbytery where the priest lives,

and everybody sees how he visits her regularly.

When asked by a concerned parishioner about it, he admits that he goes to

visit her, he says that it is to help her, that they are friends.

He even drives her to Mass in his car a few times, even though she has her

own car, and lots of small children to mind.

I do wonder about the situation, I can see that there is a closeness between

them, which does not seem safe for a Catholic priest, because I know that

he is human too, a man of blood and flesh.

"Keep watching and praying that you may not enter into temptation; the spirit

is willing, but the flesh is weak." (Matthew 26:41)

«The Fall:»

«Now the serpent was more crafty than any of the wild animals the Lord God

had made. He said to the woman, “Did God really say, ‘You must not eat from

any tree in the garden’?”

The woman said to the serpent, “We may eat fruit from the trees in the garden,

but God did say, ‘You must not eat fruit from the tree that is in the middle of

the garden, and you must not touch it, or you will die.’» (Genesis 3, 1-3)

This priest is a fantastic preacher, and is extremely polished, like all cultivated

french people. But everyone has their weakness.

I hear that there are some patients in the local nursing home who are asking

for him to come and visit them.

When he comes there to celebrate Mass, one of them in particular asks him

to please come and visit her privately, she needs to talk to him, and he

promises to do that.

A few weeks later, he still has not found the time to pop in to her, and she

asks him again, and again, he promises sincerely that he will come to talk

to her. She asks many times, but he never comes.

The poor woman is very disappointed, then becomes angry, as it surely isn't

too much to ask. He is the parish priest!

“I was a stranger, and you didn’t invite me into your home. I was naked, and

you didn’t give me clothing. I was sick and in prison, and you didn’t visit me.’

“Then they will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry or thirsty or a

stranger or naked or sick or in prison, and not help you?’“And he will answer,

‘I tell you the truth, when you refused to help the least of these my brothers and

sisters, you were refusing to help me.’»

(Matthew 25, 43-45)

My friend, who is not catholic, and not even baptized, goes to talk

with the priest a few times with a view of being baptized.

He finds the priest nice, and the teachings of the Church very

interesting.

But then one day when he knocks on his door, the priest says abruptly:

“Do not come back here again.”

He does not offer any explanation, just tells him to not come back.

My friend is shocked and hurt.

Later on the priest says “yes, yes, we will met up again”, when he

sees him at the end of Mass, because he even comes to Mass, and he

still has a bit of hope that there is a logical explanation for what

happened. But to make matters even worse, the priest cancels

every time.

It is really strange, I cannot make any sense of it, because I thought

he was a good priest.

He has lots of time to see his woman friend, but not to fulfill his

duties towards his parishioners?

Although I am very sad for my friend, I can feel his hurt, and I feel

hurt too.

I must try to not get resentful against the priest, but neither do I want

to defend him. I just do not understand because our God is a God of love.

«If could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others,

I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If I had the gift of prophecy,

and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and

if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others,

I would be nothing»

(1 Corinthians 13, 1-2)

I recommend that we start praying for him.

As I pray for him, I feel compassion.

Maybe he is experiencing a personal crisis, maybe he is at a point where he

is questioning his choice in life.

A catholic priest renounces personal intimate relationship with a woman,

marriage, having children.

It is in order that they can have MANY spiritual children, hence the title

«Father».

But a real father never abandons his children, and he certainly never tells

them to go away and «not come back».

Our faith says

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others,

you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no

attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother,

‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank

in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye,

and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.»

(Matthew 7, 1-5)

But does the priest not care that his credibility and reputation is being

damaged?

“Then Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples: “The teachers of the

law and the Pharisees sit in Moses’ seat. So you must be careful to do

everything they tell you. But do not do what they do, for they do not

practice what they preach.”

(Matthew 23, 1-3)

The priest delivers great homilies.

He tells the truth, about human nature, how cunning we are,

how much we hide from each other, and also

he talks about the nature of God.

But what is going on with him?

Is he in love with this woman?

Is it ambition for bigger things?

A secret contempt for “normal” people?

A spiritual arrogance?

Or the knowledge that he is not going to be staying in this little

village for too much longer?

But according to the teachings of the Church, all types of ambition

is wrong.

Ambition to climb the ranks within the hierarchy of the Church is

no exception, that too is a worldly ambition.

I do not know what to think.

Jesus Is Tested in the Wilderness

Then Jesus was led by the Spirit into the wilderness to be tempted by the

devil. After fasting forty days and forty nights, he was hungry. The tempter

came to him and said, “If you are the Son of God, tell these stones to

become bread.” Jesus answered, “It is written: ‘Man shall not live on

bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of God.’”

Then the devil took him to the holy city and had him stand on the

highest point of the temple. “If you are the Son of God,” he said,

“throw yourself down. For it is written: “ ‘He will command his

angels concerning you, and they will lift you up in their hands, so

that you will not strike your foot against a stone.’ ” Jesus answered

him, “It is also written: ‘Do not put the Lord your God to the test.’”

Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him

all the kingdoms of the world and their splendor. “All this I will give

you,” he said, “if you will bow down and worship me.” Jesus said to him,

“Away from me, Satan! For it is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God,

and serve him only.’” Then the devil left him, and angels came and

attended him.

(Matthew 4:1-11)

The Assumption

The procession to honour Our Lady on the feast day of Her Assumption

is ready to start.

Father has the microphone and the loudspeaker, and the Statue is being

carried by 4 men, it is quite heavy.

We pray The Rosary: The Glorious Mysteries, as we walk through the

streets of the village, up to the Square next to the town Hall, then we pass

in front of the local Café, turn the corner, stop again in front of the tourist

office, and descend the street again to return to the Chapel.

She is beautiful this Statue, She is all white, and She is holding The Child

Jesus in front of Her, who is facing outwards.

Around Her neck, there hangs a big heart, which can be opened up, and

which contains the names of children that has been consecrated to Her.

I know that she is my Mother, she knows all my hopes and needs, and she

brings them to Jesus.

After the Statue has been put back safely and the people start to leave,

Father asks me if I would be interested and available to involve myself

Mass

«As the time approached for him to be taken up to heaven, Jesus resolutely set

out for Jerusalem. And he sent messengers on ahead, who went into a Samaritan

village to get things ready for him; but the people there did not welcome him,

because he was heading for Jerusalem. When the disciples James and John saw

this, they asked, “Lord, do you want us to call fire down from heaven to destroy

them?” But Jesus turned and rebuked them. Then he and his disciples went to

another village.»

(Luke 9:51-56)

This was the gospel for today, and Mass was celebrated in the little oratory, as it

usually is during the week.

The priest said in his homily this evening:

«When people who are against us Christians, says that we are no better than

anybody else, they are right. We are not.

But when they say that our religion is not any better than any other religion,

they are wrong.

Our religion commands us not to retaliate, not to take revenge, when injustice

or harm is done towards us, like this gospel illustrates.

That is setting the bar very high, it is demanding, and it often seems impossible

to do, but the truth is that nothing is impossible to God.

It's goal is perfection in Jesus Christ.»

Another Mass

Today is the feast of The Rosary. The priest talks in his homily about the

power of the Rosary, and how a military battle in 1571 of Lépante was

won because the soldiers prayed the Rosary.

He then goes on to explain that «today it is about a spiritual battle, against

Islam which is a diabolical religion created by Satan, and also against all

the worldly manifestations of atheism.»

“Be nothing solicitous; but in every thing, by prayer and supplication,

with thanksgiving, let your petitions be made known to God. And the peace

of God, which surpasseth all understanding, keep your hearts and minds in

Christ Jesus.”

(Philippians 4: 6-7)

The woman

«Hello there, how are you?»,

I say to the woman friend of the priest, as I see her in the street with her

children.

She seems happy to see me, and we chat as we walk up the hilly street.

«Just hang on a minute», she says, «I just need to check the letter box of

Father Nicolas», she explains as she opens, with the key, the letterbox

situated at the kerb of the street outside the house, takes out the mail and

brings it to the house.

She opens the front door with the key, disappears inside, and comes back

out locking the door behind her.

I know that the priest is gone away for a few day's holiday to visit his

parents. I get that weird feeling again.

Ok, this is the Presbytery, people might have occasions to go there for a

variety of reasons, reasons to with the Church.

This looks different. It is personal.

He has given her the key to his house, for no good reason.

The letterbox is huge, it is locked, nobody can see inside it, surely

it is not urgent to empty it every day.

I remember somebody I knew who put a great significance

on being in the possession of a key to somebody's house.

At the time, the subject of the key was concerning somebody close to me,

but I remember how she spoke about The Key.

I really need to pray more for the priest, and for her too. I will pray that

she will meet somebody, a man that is available, because the priest is not.

I met her another day and she told me that she did not know what to do

for the day, because her children were with their dad, and she was therefore

alone.We were walking home after Mass.

It was a beautiful day, the air was sharp and crispy, the sun was shining and

started to heat the air.

«But I suppose I can catch up on some of the housework, there is plenty to

do there»,she adds.

My friend and I had already decided to go for a walk in the forest.

After saying goodbuy to her, we say to each other that it is a bit sad that she

should be left all alone like that.

«Will we ask her to join us?», we asked each other, and after answering

positively to that, I run after her to ask her.

«Oh, no, that is ok», she says, «Nicolas is going to come to help me to

light the fire, anyway».

I am looking at her.

Did she say «Nicolas», and not even «Father Nicolas»?

So the priest is going to come and visit her to «help her light the fire»

«A man sold me some very bad wood», she adds, «I can't even get it to

light».

Is the priest already hooked and too implicated in her life to

know how to extract himself from her ?

But why did she pretend to be all alone that day, she didn't have to say

anything? She also talked about her ex husband, how bad he is.

So was Father Nicolas her knight in shining armour who came and

rescued her from him, as he still seems to come and help her in her

«distress».

What is going to happen here, is he going to leave the priesthood so

he can be with her?

It would be a terrible loss for the Church, and for us, his parishioners.

It would confirm the opinion of all the people here who are Anti-Clerical

by their conditioning, all those people who got fed that hatred together

with the baby milk.

The terrible things carried out by people belonging to the Catholic Church

in the past has nothing to do with the teachings of Jesus.

Normally intelligent people knows that.

But they are hanging on to their prejudices as if it was something precious.

They are unable and unwilling to look beyond it.

One day your life in this world (dimension) will be over.

And then what did it all mean?

«All people are like grass,
and all their glory is like the flowers of the field;
the grass withers and the flowers fall,
but the word of the Lord endures forever.

And this is the word that was preached to you.»

(1 Peter 1:24-25)

We can come back to Him, right now in this moment, and it will make

the whole difference.

«But we impart a secret and hidden wisdom of God, which God decreed

before the ages for our glory. None of the rulers of this age understood

this, for if they had, they would not have crucified the Lord of glory.

But, as it is written,

“What no eye has seen, nor ear heard,

nor the heart of man imagined,

what God has prepared for those who love him”—

these things God has revealed to us through the Spirit. For the Spirit searches

everything, even the depths of God. For who knows a person's thoughts except

the spirit of that person, which is in him? So also no one comprehends the

thoughts of God except the Spirit of God. Now we have received not the

spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, that we might understand

the things freely given us by God.And we impart this in words not taught by

human wisdom but taught by the Spirit, interpreting spiritual truths to those

who are spiritual.

(1 Corinthians 2:7-13)

Maybe you define yourself as a citizen of a country, and or as a

professional:

«this is who I am».

But do you know who you really are, beyond those labels, and beyond

all the conditioning?

The Books in The Holy Bible is the Human Story.

The Mysteries of The Rosary contains the Truth, and shows us

the Way; Jesus.

It is the faith that fuels the desire to commit completely, and the

perseverance to understand.

It takes patience, because the Truth is contrary to this world, and

therefore our mind takes time to recognize it.

«There was a man sent from God whose name was John. He came as a

witness to testify concerning that light, so that through him all might

believe. He himself was not the light; he came only as a witness to the

light. Now this was John’s testimony when the Jewish leaders in Jerusalem

sent priests and Levites to ask him who he was. He did not fail to confess,

but confessed freely, “I am not the Messiah.”

They asked him, “Then who are you? Are you Elijah?”

He said, “I am not.”

“Are you the Prophet?”

He answered, “No.”

Finally they said, “Who are you? Give us an answer to take back to those

who sent us. What do you say about yourself?”

John replied in the words of Isaiah the prophet, “I am the voice of one

calling in the wilderness, ‘Make straight the way for the Lord.’”

Now the Pharisees who had been sent questioned him, “Why then do you

baptize if you are not the Messiah, nor Elijah, nor the Prophet?”

“I baptize with water,” John replied, “but among you stands one you do

not know. He is the one who comes after me, the straps of whose sandals

I am not worthy to untie.”This all happened at Bethany on the other side

of the Jordan, where John was baptizing.»

(John 1:6-8. 19-28 )

Think about the facts:

We are living on a small planet and this round

ball/planet/boat («we are all in the same boat!») rotates on its axis, all the while

continually moving around the sun, without which there would be no life here.

At the same time the moon turns around it.

This is happening in a univers, that we know, is only one univers in an infinite

amount of universes.

When I was very little, «to go to the moon» was a way of saying that

something was impossible.

And then, when I was still little, people arrived on the moon and walked on it.

And since then, there has been a lot of exploration of space.

But does the lives of human beings improve?

«But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s

special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called

you out of darkness into his wonderful light.»

(1 Peter 2:9)

Think of the configurations on your computer, they are set in place

and your computer acts according to them, but as we know, they can also

be re-set, they can be changed.

You would normally have a good reason to re-configure the programs on

your computer, it would be necessary.

We are not so different, we can change, re-configure, our mindset and

our behaviour.

"Do not be conformed to this world, but continuously be transformed by

the renewing of your minds so that you may be able to determine what

God's will is what is proper, pleasing, and perfect.

For by the grace given to me I ask every one of you not to think of yourself

more highly than you should think, rather to think of yourself with sober

judgment on the measure of faith that God has assigned each of you.

For we have many parts in one body, but these parts do not all have the

same function.

(Romans 12: 2-4)

The values in the particular culture that we grow up in, plus our personal

experience with our parents,siblings, family and friends, these are the

elements which forms ideas, concepts and conclusions, about ourselves

and others.

And we believe it to be who we are, that it is the truth about us and the

world.

«You were taught, with regard to your former way of life, to put off your

old self, which is being corrupted by its deceitful desires; to be made

new in the attitude of your minds; and to put on the new self, created

to be like God in true righteousness and holiness.Therefore each of you

must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor, for we are

all members of one body.»

(Ephesians 4:22-25)

Mystery of God, mystery of man

Headings

THE ONE WHO IS

“For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.”

(2 Timothy 1:7)

Mass

(1 Corinthians 2:7-13)